Had I grown up in da hood, I most likely would have been shot already. Probably due to phrases such as ‘da hood.’ But it’s been a while since I’ve had a post promoting the ever-important concept of not taking yourself too seriously. Also known as the ‘I am not John Mayer’ concept. Unless, of course, you’re reading this, Mr. Mayer. Then, you are John Mayer. Wouldn’t want to confuse you, now. So, on with the honesty:

  • Sometimes I pretend John Mayer reads my blog.
  • I haven’t changed my strings in three weeks.
  • I have listed ‘prayer’ as one of the ‘song transition tools’ before. As in, ‘Man, how are we gonna get from capo 3 to capo 4 in between songs?’ ‘I know! Let’s pray!’
  • Sometimes I decide whether a song sounds good or bad before I’ve heard it.
  • I have turned my amp up after I’ve been sound-checked. Hey, to compensate for the people that are now in the auditorium! ;)
  • I’ve realized that unbeknownst to me, I have developed a defense mechanism of deflecting away compliments to such a degree as to frustrate the giver of the compliment; so that, when they do not compliment me, I can pass it off as that I really did sound good, but it’s just that they have become weary of giving unreceived compliments. Just recently realized that one. Frightening to find out sometimes how true the book of Jeremiah is when it says that the heart is deceitful and wicked.
  • I had to google ‘deceitfully wicked above all things’ to figure out that that verse was in Jeremiah.
  • I have commented on message board threads about pedals that I have never played.
  • I listen to my own songs. (Oooh, that one grosses me out.)
  • I think I have played Edge’s solo from ‘Acrobat’ in almost every minor key worship song that exists.
  • And will admitting that stop me? hehehehe (That laugh means…’nooooo’.)
  • There are some really kickin’ Boss pedals.
  • I have started songs in wrong keys during practice, and then went back over to fiddle with my Avioms pretending I just wasn’t hearing things right.
  • There have been times when I have been literally almost paralyzed by hoping that what other people think of me is that I’m someone who doesn’t care what other people think of me.
  • ‘Bad Romance’ is blasted catchy.
  • When I don’t understand a movie, I usually comment on the ‘philosophical undertones.’ You can also interchange ‘philosophical’ to ‘sociological’ every once in a while for good measure. It works the same with guitar gear, but you have to say ‘harmonics.’
  • And, the worst thing I can possibly think of to get Freudian (that’s more good time homey-speak right there, yo) over:

The M13 doesn’t sound as bad as I’d like it to.

Splendid.
Karl.